Slapping the chains on early
Am I ready for manual labor
but is anyone else?

If I start working, will it reflect poorly on myself?
Will I become admirable, or just another chump.
I should have been a scientist, I think to myself.
I should have been a writer, I think to myself.
I'm too passive, not aggressive enough to persue what I truly want.
But what is it that I truly want?
Is it just her, or do I want more than that.
Isn't there more to life than finding the one you love?
After you find her, aren't you supposed to speak up?
To tell you the truth, I wish I knew.
I'll probably let her slip away just like all the others.
Now that I'm comfortable with where we are, we'll stay like this forever.
Or we won't. She'll get bored, she'll move on.
I'll always feel slightly wounded, but maybe it's better than the alternative.
I'd rather stay in the shadows than break her heart.
Does staying in the shadows break her heart?
I frown, brow furled. I can't stand this.
There's no easy resolution.
Just a resolution, and I don't like it.
Option A is the best one, I make a move, and they respond accordingly. In a while, we feel ready to move past that and become more.
Option B is the one I dread, I make a move, and we crash in a blaze of glory, sucking everyone we know down into a pool of destruction.
Option C is the one I do, I never make a move, things stay the same, eventually they give up, eventually I give up. We were friends, but we grew distant.
It doesn't take a statictician to figure out that 2/3rds of me is fearful. Is the 1/3rd enough for me to try?
And so I sit here contemplating. Will I even see her again? Probably not. We'll grow distant, and then no more.
It's unfortunate that university costs so much, and the place where you learn the most is outside the classroom.
The unfortunate truth.